It’s Time to Stop Following “The Golden Rule” (2024)

Summary.

“Treat others as you would like to be treated.” We’ve all heard the phrase. But in our modern workplace, treating others as you would like to be treated isn’t always the best option. It’s time to adopt a “New Golden Rule:” Treat others as they would like to be treated. All it takes to put this new mindset into practice is understanding, curiosity, and compromise.

1. Challenge your assumptions. When you find yourself making assumptions about another person, ask: Where are these beliefs coming from? What information am I missing?
2. Ask questions and listen. The best way to really find out how someone else would like to be treated is to simply ask. Some questions that might be helpful to ask those around you include: How do you prefer to communicate — email or Slack? Is now still a good time for us to connect? In what format do you need the information about this project?
3. Replace ‘or’ with ‘and.’ When our preferences differ from others, it’s essential to look for a solution that works for everyone involved. The more you can accommodate the preferences of the most people involved, the better. So whenever you find yourself in a seemingly ‘or’ situation, take a step back and look for an ‘and.’

• Irina Cozma, Ph.D., is a career and executive coach who supports professionals to have better career adventures. She coached hundreds of Fortune 500 executives from global organizations like Salesforce, Hitachi, and Abbott. Irina also coaches startups and the Physicians MBA at the University of Tennessee. Download her free career guide to help you prepare for your next career adventure.